God's faith IN us

One of the most important things in my life is that I am faithful with all that God has given me.  Also that I know God can do anything He chooses.  Any limits that I see are from me!  Many times, I know God CAN do anything He desires, but do I believe He will?   I have watched many times in my life, God do things that amaze me and yet I know that I should not be surprised.  It is His character.  He loves to give His children good gifts.  I never want to seek His hand, just fall in love with His heart.  That is  how I have found the difference between true faith and moments of faith.  HIS faith is IN us ALL the time!  Faith in us lasts only for a short time.  Yes, I have faith in what His word says but only because I see HIS faithfulness.  So I can LIVE in faith because of Him or I can just have it every once in a while but it only lasts as long as the moment because it is just MY faith.  Faith has to be IN and THROUGH God! 

As I am watching God work in our desperate situation these past few months, I have realized that without Him, I have no faith!  I can choose to look to Him or choose to believe what my circumstances say but ultimately that faith comes from reading His word and seeing Him work.  It's nothing in me.  Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. (Hebrews 11:1)  God is the only one that can increase my faith through hope and things not seen.  I don't have an answer right now on how our problems are going to work out.  Everyone around me, would say that it is hopeless.  I even say it is hopeless!  HOWEVER, I have a God who says that," He cares for the birds of the air and they neither sow nor reap, how much more does He care for me..."  Also, His word says He has plans to prosper us and to give us a hope and a future.  MY faith would be that I could get out of these things by way of MY doing and even then, It would not help or if it did, it would be for a very short time!  Faith in HIM says that I know I can not get out of this but I know that my God knows and is working for us!  If He is for us, who can be against us?  So no matter what the situation is that I am in, there is NOTHING that can happen that does not sift through His hand first.  It does not mean that things won't get tough but if my faith is from Him, then I will know that all things work together for good for those who love Him.  That is what His word says.  I can come up with all kinds of solutions but I know that His way is best and better than my ideas!  Our will would be the same as God's if we had all the facts!  In other words, if we knew everything, and we don't, we would understand why we have to wait sometimes or why things don't work out in the way we choose!  I have come to find out, that usually I have been wrong and thankful that things did not go my way! 

Last night, I had been asked to take care of someones pet and watch their home while they were away.  I did not want to tell her that we are losing our house and the time they wanted me to dog sit would be the week we may have to move.  I began to talk and it just came out.  We continued to talk and it was such a blessing to me!  I got off of the phone and thanked God for using my trial to bless others.  It is all worth it if other's can see God's character through my circumstances.  How humbling!  After something like that happens, I usually begin to be attacked.  This morning I began to battle my thoughts.  Not fear, just questioning.  I stopped immediately and told God that I will continue to believe Him and that I will continue to trust Him.  Later today, God blessed us AGAIN with another substantial amount of money.  I have never asked for money!  I just keep focusing on Him and having faith from Him that He can and WILL provide!  He has chosen blessing us through money at this point in our situation. 

I know I don't deserve all the blessings that God is giving!  I feel so unworthy!  I see my past mistakes and can't, for the life of me, understand why He sees fit to bless me in these ways!  I just know that His love is beyond anything that I can imagine and He can do anything He wants to because He is God not because I am me!  That is the faith I live for! 

I will continue to follow Him and believe that His plan is best no matter what everything around me says.  Please know that His faith is IN you also!  He desires for us to trust Him the way that children trust their parents.  My 2 year old does not wake up wondering if I will feed him or wash his clothes or where he will lay his head at night!  He just lives and has "faith" that I will.  He knows I always have!  That is the hope we have in our heavenly Father. 

We are His children and we can trust Him to supply ALL of our needs!  I am so thankful for His provision and His timing!  Rest knowing that He can be that in your life!  Ask for His faith in you to grow!  It will!

Year of blessing is upon us

My birthday was on the 8th of October.  I turned a number that ends in 0.  It is not 30 and not 50.  So you can pretty much guess what that number is.  Well, I dreaded the day.  I had a REALLY hard time turning 30!  Why?  Because it meant 40 was the next big one!  Needless to say I survived and lived to tell about it!  It happened to be the most memorable birthday so far.  Here's the story...

My grandma grew up in a small town that I ABSOLUTELY love.  Lots of great memories for me and when I go back there, I just feel all warm and fuzzy inside!  A piece of heaven on earth.  So, for my birthday, I asked my husband if we could go there for the day.  The baby, him and I left around noon.  My husband began to talk to me.  He said he was going to give me a card, then he was going to write a letter but he decided speaking what he had to say was the only way. 

God layed on his heart earlier that week a word for me that he was supposed to share.  He began to tell me of how God had spoke the number "40" in his heart and what symbolism it has in the bible.  Noah with 40 days and nights, Moses was on the mountain for 40 days before he received the 10 commandments, Jesus was in the desert 40 days and nights and tempted by satan himself, the Israelites wandered around for 40 years...He began to search it out and realized it always meant trial and tribulation.  He felt like that was NOT good to share with me ON my birthday!  Did it mean my 40th year was going to get worse?  We have been through so much!  Especially this past year.  Job loss, miscarriage, my grandmother dying, gestational diabetes with my pregnancy, children going to Africa for 6 weeks, losing our house and MANY other things.  He was very hesitant to go any further!  God then spoke to him very sweetly and reminded him that it will be my 41ST year!  40 years is done and what happened after all the things mentioned in the bible after 40 years?  BLESSING!  God poured out blessing, favor and His hand was seen!  God shared with my husband that the "desert" and wandering are over!  Everything that the enemy has come to destroy will be returned to me and His glory will be seen this coming year!  WOW!  Needless to say, I was crying by the time He finished!

I felt like all that we have been through, was wiped away that instant!  Not liked wiped away and forgotten but wiped away as in peace replaced all the doubt.  All the times of wondering, questioning, and anxiousness were OVER!  It was actually something that I had already knew, just not in the way God spoke to my husband.  I had more of the idea of Christmas and what it is like to have this fun gift to give your child and you can't wait for him to open it but you know it is best to wait for that special day!  God is waiting for that day when He can reveal His plan.  A day when we are at the end and we realize that there is NO one but God who can get us out of our mess!  

We went out to dinner that evening and on our way home, my 14 year old called and was so excited!  She was talking really fast and I told her to slow down so I could understand her.  She continued to tell me that in the mail we received an envelope.  She opened it and it had a letter with a check in it.  A SUBSTANTIAL amount!   An amount that I cannot imagine anyone being able to just write a check for without being late on bills or making a house payment on time!  I know, hard to believe, I began to cry!  God was confirming my husbands word to me that the year of blessing was upon us!  We don't know who sent the check.  The letter just said that they read my blog and that they wanted to bless us.  BOY did they ever!  It was from the hand of God!  We are so thankful for obedience and a willingness to give in this way to us.  It is so much more than the money!  It is a peace that God IS for us!  If He is for us, who can be against us?!  The check was great and did help us make it this month with our bills that we had NO way to pay!  But more importantly, it came ON my birthday and it is proof that our year of blessing is upon us and that God is going to continue to provide!  I already knew that, but to SEE it is so amazing! 

I have some other little stories that I will share in the weeks to come of His blessings and from the way it looks, more that I don't know about yet.  I thank you for all of your prayers and want you to know we feel them!  Please know God IS who He says He is, and He does what He says He is going to do!  Take care of His children!  If you have something that you are not sure if He is hearing you and things look really bad, hang in there and keep your eyes focused on Him NOT your circumstances!  They are NOTHING to Him!  They can change with just one word from His heart!

40 isn't so bad after all!

Foto Friday~ not sure what to call this!

It's amazing what brothers find to do with their siblings!

I'm not sure why this poor sweet baby was tormented in this way!

I guess with 8 brothers, she better get used to it!

So far, she has seemed to survive just fine!

Hopefully the love from us will give her the ability to survive THESE sort of situations!

Have a weekend filled with love!

One year ago...

Today, is the one year anniversary of my sweet, precious grandma's death.

She is sitting at Jesus feet now.

 It's actually where she always longed to be!

But I am selfish and wish I could be sitting with her in my living room!

I have missed her so much!

I don't quite know how I have done it without her!

She always had so much wisdom to share. 

She had a way of making me know I was not alone when I was not the parent I should have been...

When I failed to love my husband the way God intended, she would share with me the ways she failed as a wife but how forgiving God was with her.

Most importantly, she showed me the power of a relationship with Christ! 

The power of prayer and that the bible is the LIVING word of God and that it will NEVER fail me!

So although I miss her, I realize that the legacy she has left me, will be passed down for generations and she is always with me! 

And that sweet day, when I enter the gates of heaven, she will be there with her arms opened wide and tell me of all the things she has learned again!  Oh that sweet, sweet day!

"Little" FAITH!

In my morning bible study, we were asked what "little" faith might mean.  We all sat there and had a real hard time coming up with an answer.  I think we were all in agreement that the things we could think of that required faith, were all in the end, BIG!  So faith, according to the word of God in Hebrews 11 is: the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen.  I thought I would share a little story with you that happened a couple weeks ago that was an example to me of "little" faith but turned into something BIG! 

I went to our local pet supply store to get rabbit food with our 6 year old.  We went through the normal routine of looking at the toy trucks, tractors, and trailers.  We also went through the normal routine of the question/answer game that ends with, "no honey, I can't but that today."  There was a specific little truck he REALLY wanted and he wanted a trailer to go with it.   I told him I WOULD buy the truck because he had helped me earlier that day, clean and he had been very diligent at keeping on task.  I continued to tell him, that because daddy still has no job, I cannot possibly get the trailer to go with it and that maybe soon, he could earn some money to buy it and I gave him my word that we would come back when he had earned the money.  He shook his head yes and walked out proudly with his little blue truck.  I will say, I thought there might be a little more of a protest or at least some sort of bargaining that might happen.  I was so proud of him and told him that it made me so happy that he listened and respected my "wait" answer. 

The next stop was our local discount bread store.  We were waiting in line and an elderly gentleman in front of us turned around and looked down at my little boy and said in a weak, scratchy voice, "This is what you call being at the right place at the right time little man!"  He then handed my son a $1 bill.  Then another, and then another.  My sons eyes grew bigger and bigger with each dollar he gave him.  He said, "Thank you so much!"  The gentleman slowly turned around with a smile and walked out.  The cashier had a huge smile on her face and looked at me and winked.  My little boy turned to me and said, "Mommy, he gave me ALL the money he had!"  Such a sweet thing for him to notice that the gentleman made a sacrifice for him. 

We continued outside and I took him by the hands and looked into his big blue eyes and said, "Sweetheart, this is God's reward to you for listening and obeying me earlier.  Do you remember how much that trailer you wanted was?"

"No...do I have enough in my hand mommy?"  He questioned.

"YEP!  The trailer was $2.99 and you now have $3 in your hand!  God knew your heart and He has blessed you for your obedience!"

"Can we go get my trailer mom?"

"That's where I was planning on going!"

About 2 blocks later, God quietly whispered to my heart, "If I care about a 6 year old and finding him a way to get a trailer, don't you think I can take care of you and provide all that YOU need?!

I began to cry!  It has been a year now without a job.  I'm not complaining and my faith is totally in God, but our circumstances from the outside looking in, is BAD!  I have wondered how in the world we are getting out of this one!  What is going to happen!  But through that moment of teaching my sweet child the ability of God and His great love for him, God taught ME that I am His child also and that He sees, He knows, He cares, and He provides! 

So, when it looks like everything around me is caving in and I have no answers and only questions, I can walk in BIG faith knowing that my God CAN and WILL take care of me!  My son's little trailer sitting on his bedroom floor, is a reminder of all that my God can do!  If he can whisper in a man's ear to give a little boy all the money in his hand, then I know that He can take care of our family and it only takes one whisper to turn everything around!  I will continue to look to Him and I am persuaded that He is able!   My hope is that He sees and knows our needs, the evidence is that He is working in our behalf to bring glory to Him through our circumstances.

Just ask my little boy!  He has no doubt!!

6 months of pure bliss!

Yes!  She is 6 months already! 
It really amazes me that half a year has come and gone! 
She is just simply...
...PRECIOUS...
In EVERY way!

Full of smiles, giggles and so far, toothless grins!

She is our hope of a future that God prospers.

He has done so much and I know, when I look at her,

He is who He says He is and WILL do what He says He will do!

A baby just reminds me of the mercy and grace of God!

Choosing to give me a gift that only HE can give to someone who does not deserve it!

I am SO privileged to be her mommy!

God, thank you!!

I am blessed!

Foto Friday~ no words need to be said!

May God's love reach this sweet little one in Malawi, Africa as she grows!
Someday, hopefully, she will be greeted in heaven by us because we have prayed for her to recieve Jesus into her heart! 

Foto Friday~They are back!

The day FINALLY came! 
We picked up our sweet, world traveling, children from the airport! 

Big and little sister bonded again!

And the middle sister and big sister where so excited to be together again!

We are hearing story after story and I am having the time of my life listening!  And the joy of just looking at their faces is intoxicating!  I go up and hug them just because I can!  :)

Thank you for ALL of your prayers!  God has been SO good!