Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Convicted to tell...

My hubby took a long 4 day weekend!  We really had nothing planned but yet did so much and yet seemed like nothing got done that we had planned!  :)  Except, family, family and more family!  Everyone from cousins to grandparents!  I LOVE family!  But I have many who do not know Jesus!

My aunt died last week.  She lived many, many miles away so we did not get to see her often.  She was very loved by family but that peace of me knowing that she loved Jesus is just not there!  Last October she came to visit and we visited but nothing to in depth.  I had no idea that it would be the last time we would meet face to face!  I am busy you know!  With kids, appointments, and life! HA!  I even had the thought that she might need to hear about the freedom Jesus brings but hoped deep inside she would just know that we were different and someday she would ask why.  That would be less abrasive!  Maybe pride on my part, although I really never have been that way.  I love to tell others about Him!  I really think I was just to hurried to worry about it!  And that bothers me!  Let me rephrase that: it sickens me deep in my heart!  Too busy to ask her, "Do you love Jesus with all of your heart?  Do you know there is a heaven and a hell and if you do not choose THIS day whom you will serve, it may be to late!" 

Too busy?!! *tears*

So now, I sit here with regret but there is nothing I can do but learn from it!  Did it cost a person there soul?  Is that why God had me spend time with her 7 months ago?  Was I supposed to tell her of His love but was too busy to hear the voice of my shepherd? 

I have had my heart pricked and softened!  I have woke up to the lost in this world and even just the lost in my family!  There is no better time than now!  I always teach my children 2 questions to ask themselves when making  a decision:
1.   Will I regret it if I do it?
2 .  Will I regret it if I don't?

I really am saddened that I did not stop to think of those 2 questions the last time I saw my sweet aunts face!  I thought I would see her again!  Would I regret it if I WOULD have asked her if she loved Jesus with all of her heart?  NO!  Do I regret it that I did not?  DEFINATELY!   It NEVER entered my mind that in the coming months, she would get cancer and die and there would not be another chance to tell her of God's forgiving love!  We NEVER know the time when we look at somebody's face for the last time!  Remember that as I know I will!  Whether it be your beautiful child, husband or best friend!

Do I feel guilty?  No.  Convicted?  Absolutely!  


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