Saturday, September 25, 2010

More than that...

I must admit sharing our wonderful news yesterday was a cleansing of my soul.  AFter the week we had, I had to share something good.  This baby is so much more then what it has been in the past.  Don't get me wrong, EVERY ONE of my pregnancies has been a joy and a miracle in my eyes.  But this time it is more than that. 

On Wednesday my husband lost his job.  I can't even begin to explain the emotions I have been through in the past couple of days.  I know God is my provider and I know the verses in the bible that tell me He cares for me and I DO believe them.  However, it has been very hard to feel anything but what my flesh feels right now.  I have been fighting my fleshly fear and worries with scripture and He has been so faithful to bring my heart peace.  But seeing my husband broken, our bank account with already nothing left, our babies faces and wondering where the food will come from and how we will pay our mortgage, does get to a person!  I am to walk by FAITH and not by SIGHT.  God has been reminding me of that hourly!  I am not to concentrate on the things I listed above but to put my faith in the one who looks at that list and can erase all of it and turn it into good.  My hope is never to be in my circumstances, but to be in HIM!  I am believing that! 

So, this baby is a promise of our future.  That He is thinking ahead, that He has not left us and the guarantee that He does love us!  What greater promise of a future than a child growing inside of you!  I can't see this little one right now as it is being knit together in my womb, but I KNOW that it is there!  I go by FAITH not SIGHT!  God has used this little one and it is only 10 weeks old, to change me and mold me into more of what He desires me to be.  TOTALLY dependent on Him!  Not in a paycheck, my home, or my comforts! But to the one who has given me life and life to the little babe growing inside of me.

This is not easy for me to always "feel", but just as David did when running from King Saul, I know who my God is and I am determined to trust in Him and I will NOT be moved or shaken! 

If you could please lift our family up in your prayers as my husband searches for a job and we learn to put all that we have in Christ's hands, I would appreciate it!  I know it is through the valley's that we can appreciate the mountains, but it is sometimes very lonely in the valley!  WE WILL climb up the mountain and take in the view again, but for today, we will trust Him in the valley too!



Shelly said...

still praying, dear friend...

Robin said...

Heather, I will be praying for you daily. Big ((hugs)).

****Clanton Clan***** said...

I'm so sorry to hear that you guys are going through this in the midst of such a joyful time with the new little blessing. You have such strength though. Give it God...he WILL provide.

We will certainly keep you in our prayers. If there is anything that we can help you with, please let me know!

halmar said...

I came over from At the Well, and I read a little of your previous posts. Oh my can I relate. My husband also lost his job when I was 7 weeks pregnant with our last baby (#6 for us) in April of 2009. It was a battle to keep the right perspective, but I can tell you that the Lord will be faithful. He has blessed you with that sweet baby, and He will provide for your needs. Not always wants, but needs. And sometimes He blesses with gifts beyond measure! My husband is now working a contract job, which will end in December and will bring us to another point of trust in the Lord. I have seen and know that He is near to you. He will provide, and He will care for you and your family. I will be praying and checking back with your blog for updates.


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