Tuesday, March 31, 2009

In spite of Me!

As a mother I wonder so many times what kind of impact I am making on my children for the sake of Jesus. I see so much my flesh and just wonder if I am being the example God really desires me to be for my children. Well, yesterday I had what I call a camel moment from God. (Those are the moments I use to get through the "dry" days. They carry me through just as a camel stores up fat in his humps to get through the desert.) We were sitting in our usual places for our morning bible time and I was talking to the children about Luke 9:23-26. It is about denying yourself and taking up your cross daily. I was telling the little ones it might mean sharing a toy that you want to play with or giving your last favorite piece of candy to somebody who had none. To the older ones, I said maybe it might be doing something that is right that you may lose friends over or they might laugh at you. You put someone else first instead of only thinking about yourself and what you want. I sometimes wonder how much they all listen. Some mornings it is like we are all on the same page and other times I feel all I really do is talk to myself.

Earlier that morning my mom called and said there was a lady from Bosnia at her church that came up to her and asked if she knew of anyone trying to get rid of a cat. She really wanted one. Immediately we came to my mom's mind. My oldest son has an 8 month old kitten that he took in. He paid for her to be spayed and all of her shots, buys all of her food and anything else she might need. I never said a word to him about giving HIS kitten to her. After bible time I was in the kitchen, and he came in and said, "Mom, when you praying during bible time, God told me I was to give Midnight to the lady in Bosnia and to buy everything she might need to get her started with the cat. " He started crying and I started crying. It was a very special time! My first thought was, I'll find another way! It is so hard to see my son sacrifice something that is so important to him! It was not only something he loved, but something he had spent quite a bit of money on! It was then that I realized the prayers I have prayed for him to have an encounter with God and for my children to hear God's voice was being answered! How could I even think of stopping something so valuable in my son's life? Through my son's tears, I reminded him of the sacrifice that God made for us when He allowed His only son to die on the cross for us! I'm sure He did want to see His son suffer. He could have let the cup pass from Him, but He knew what was best. Now, my son is just sacrificing a cat, but it was such a great moment for us to look and appreciate the cross and all that our Jesus has done for us! It is all about our hearts. Are we willing to deny ourselves and pick up our cross daily? The cross was not just a little thing that he could carry in one of His hands. He had to carry and drag it on His back in the heat, on dirt roads while people were laughing and mocking Him! Sometimes the things He asks us to do are not easy, but if we are looking to Him, He will be there to pick us up and strengthen us. When my son hands that kitten over to the Bosnian lady, it will not be easy, but God will be there and I take comfort in knowing that whatever God asks of my children, no matter how difficult, He is right beside them. This has eternal value! It also reminded me, that no matter how my humanness comes through so often, God is faithful, and He DOES use me to teach my children about Him in spite of me!

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