Monday, June 15, 2009
Journey to Colorado
My son is in Colorado! I do not know how I will survive when he leaves home for good! My tears have turned into anticipation for his safe return the end of the week. So far, I think he has had a great time. I will blog when he returns of all the things he has experienced.
Friday, June 12, 2009
A reminder from God!
My 14 year old daughter has a blog and she wrote this on hers today. I got permission to use it on mine. She puts me to shame in the spiritual department! She has such a beautiful relationship with her heavenly Father! I thought I would share what she wrote on my blog. I thought it was very beautiful and a great reminder of the character of our heavenly Father!...
I've been studying and reading a lot about God's love lately. I want a greater understanding of His perfect, unconditional love. The bible is jam-packed full of verses and chapters about His love, and that's what I'm blogging about today.
Last night as I was doing my bible time, I was finding all the excuses and reasons that I though somehow disqualified me from being loved by God. Like I've sinned too much, or am too much of a failure for God to really love me with the love that is written about in the bible. I felt as if God was speaking to my heart, and I wrote this 'poem.' It's called, "I Love You Anyway."
So you're weak and can't take one step on your own.
It's ok, I love you anyway.
You think you're greedy. Always desiring the newest, the best, and the greatest that this world has to offer, without remembering what truly makes you valuable. You are my child.
I love you anyway.
You think you don't do enough good things, or follow enough rules to impress me.
It's ok. I love you anyway.
You say you aren't talented enough to do anything for my glory.
It's ok, I love you anyway.
You believe you're a failure. Always giving into temptation, choosing the easy way over the righteous way.
That's ok. I love you anyway.
You don't think your testimony is captivating, amusing, or unusually dazzling enough to share.
That's ok. I still love anyway.
You doubt my love, you choose to believe, follow, or trust a human you can see who may be very wrong, over a God you can't see, but is always right.
I love you anyway.
We don't deserve God's love, we can never earn it. We don't have to be strong, or powerful. In fact, we must become weak before Jesus so that His power can be our power.
Everyone struggles with greed at some point, but I'm learning that the more we seek God, and grow in His love, the less we'll desire the emptiness of this world.
God knows that we're humans, we have finite minds, and it's so liberating to rest in the fact that God chooses the "weak and foolish" things of the world to shame the wise. God loves using broken people, it gives Him a chance to do what He does best. Heal. Not just us, but others around us.
I'm learning that we are all given talents. The amount of talent, and what the talent is, is not important. A humble heart that is willing to be used entirely for God and His glory is all that God wants.
God knows we're human, and that we sometimes give in to temptation. That's why He sent His son so that our sins can be remembered no more, if only we'll hand they over and let them be cast away.
God also knows that we doubt. Our worldly programmed eyes deceive us, and if we're not careful we can let ourselves get to the point where all we believe in is what we can see with our eyes. It is what is UNseen that lasts forever.
It's truly awesome to know that I know that I know that I know that I KNOW Jesus loves me. He doesn't despise me. I don't disgust Him. He's not angry with me. The more I seek Him, the more I find Him. The more I find Him, the more I love Him. The more I love Him, the more I realize that His love for me is not based on me, or what I do.
I can have the knowledge of God and not have a heart for Him at all. I can follow all the rules, trying to impress God or "earn" His forgiveness and love, but all He really wants is my heart.
What will it take for us to finally believe that good works, and human strength doesn't save us. We don't, and never will deserve God's love. All the good works in the world are microscopic when laid before our perfect savior.
So next time, when you're overwhelmed with your weaknesses and failures and short-comings. Just like I was the other night. Listen as your Father whispers to your heart.
"I love you anyway."
I've been studying and reading a lot about God's love lately. I want a greater understanding of His perfect, unconditional love. The bible is jam-packed full of verses and chapters about His love, and that's what I'm blogging about today.
Last night as I was doing my bible time, I was finding all the excuses and reasons that I though somehow disqualified me from being loved by God. Like I've sinned too much, or am too much of a failure for God to really love me with the love that is written about in the bible. I felt as if God was speaking to my heart, and I wrote this 'poem.' It's called, "I Love You Anyway."
So you're weak and can't take one step on your own.
It's ok, I love you anyway.
You think you're greedy. Always desiring the newest, the best, and the greatest that this world has to offer, without remembering what truly makes you valuable. You are my child.
I love you anyway.
You think you don't do enough good things, or follow enough rules to impress me.
It's ok. I love you anyway.
You say you aren't talented enough to do anything for my glory.
It's ok, I love you anyway.
You believe you're a failure. Always giving into temptation, choosing the easy way over the righteous way.
That's ok. I love you anyway.
You don't think your testimony is captivating, amusing, or unusually dazzling enough to share.
That's ok. I still love anyway.
You doubt my love, you choose to believe, follow, or trust a human you can see who may be very wrong, over a God you can't see, but is always right.
I love you anyway.
We don't deserve God's love, we can never earn it. We don't have to be strong, or powerful. In fact, we must become weak before Jesus so that His power can be our power.
Everyone struggles with greed at some point, but I'm learning that the more we seek God, and grow in His love, the less we'll desire the emptiness of this world.
God knows that we're humans, we have finite minds, and it's so liberating to rest in the fact that God chooses the "weak and foolish" things of the world to shame the wise. God loves using broken people, it gives Him a chance to do what He does best. Heal. Not just us, but others around us.
I'm learning that we are all given talents. The amount of talent, and what the talent is, is not important. A humble heart that is willing to be used entirely for God and His glory is all that God wants.
God knows we're human, and that we sometimes give in to temptation. That's why He sent His son so that our sins can be remembered no more, if only we'll hand they over and let them be cast away.
God also knows that we doubt. Our worldly programmed eyes deceive us, and if we're not careful we can let ourselves get to the point where all we believe in is what we can see with our eyes. It is what is UNseen that lasts forever.
It's truly awesome to know that I know that I know that I know that I KNOW Jesus loves me. He doesn't despise me. I don't disgust Him. He's not angry with me. The more I seek Him, the more I find Him. The more I find Him, the more I love Him. The more I love Him, the more I realize that His love for me is not based on me, or what I do.
I can have the knowledge of God and not have a heart for Him at all. I can follow all the rules, trying to impress God or "earn" His forgiveness and love, but all He really wants is my heart.
What will it take for us to finally believe that good works, and human strength doesn't save us. We don't, and never will deserve God's love. All the good works in the world are microscopic when laid before our perfect savior.
So next time, when you're overwhelmed with your weaknesses and failures and short-comings. Just like I was the other night. Listen as your Father whispers to your heart.
"I love you anyway."
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Soon to be a BIG BROTHER!
Thought I would post a picture of the baby of our family. He only has a short time as the baby then HE will be a big brother! He is such a baby yet! He will grow up quick! Oh, how I love him, my sweet little man!! Thank you God for the many blessings you have given me and help me to see them as blessings from you every moment!
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Diapers and Wipes
It never fails! Whether going out the door, putting little ones down for a very needed nap, or after being dressed in their finest clothes, a smell arises that can cause my patience to be tested. I just get things the way I need it and an unexpected dirty diaper arises. So my story begins...
I was just putting my youngest down for a nap with my 3 year old trailing behind me. I was at the top of the stairs with my youngest in my arms AND 9 months pregnant and I felt and heard an explosion erupt from the diaper area of the little, innocent thing. With a nap VERY needed by my son (and mom), I began to feel the urge to scream! I did use self-control! However, all the diapers and wipes were down the steep, tiring, never ending, stairway! Normally stairs would not be that big of a deal, but carrying the extra load of pregnancy, getting my 3 year old to get his blanket, a drink, get a kiss from big sister, get a hug from big brother, and go to the bathroom, it was quite a process! So an interruption of changing a diaper and retrieving all the supplies was a test of patience that I had not planned! So to save myself the physical exertion, I decided to ask my 3 year old if he would help me and get a diaper and wipes for his little brother. He turned around with I think the smell of burning rubber under his feet! He was so anxious to help his mom, (or maybe just to delay nap time :)! Quite a few minutes later, he brought the wipes up to me with a huge smile on his face and said, "Here mommy, I'm a beeeg helper!" He didn't think about the stairs and all the extra steps he would have to take. He just couldn't wait to be a servant and use all that he had to please me.
Later that day, (during the much needed nap time that we did finally make it to). I began to recall that incident and God laid something on my heart. The eagerness of my 3 year old to serve his mommy, is the exact way the way He desires us to be with Him as His children. There are times in our life when things are going pretty smooth and then something unexpected happens. A dirty diaper! We can make a choice to make excuses and think of ways to get out of something that God wants us to do OR we can look to God when He asks us to step out for Him. (Like my little 3 year old did for me. No questions asked, the smell of burnt rubber under his feet.) God wants me to obey with the anticipation of pleasing Him! My 3 year old did not consider how much quicker and easier if would have been for mommy to get the diaper. He did not look at all those stairs and how much work and effort it would take HIS little legs! he just went! God will ask things of us that we may think surely He could find somebody else who better fits the role or task He asks of us! I have said to God, "Surely there is a mother out there that could raise 11 children better than me God! Don't you see how weak I am?! This is hard God! Why do you trust me so much?!" He responds by letting me know that when we are out of our comfort zones and we are feeling weak, that is where He can show us His strength! We just need to be willing to say, "Okay God. It is tough and I don't always understand, but here I am!"
I told my 3 year old what a "beeeg" helper he was to mommy and how much I appreciated his help. You see, I could have done it my self! I did not NEED him to go downstairs fro me! I just asked him to help me. God does not NEED us to help Him. He could use a tree if He choose to! He just asks us to help Him and hopes that we obey and serve Him because that is what He desires from us! If we are eager to serve Him and with joy, do what He has called us to do, He will ask us to do more and more for Him! That will bring great contentment to our hearts and great pleasure to Him! That should be the greatest desire in our hearts is to please our heavenly Father! Just as my 3 year old pleased me, my Heavenly Father will be pleased with me when I chose His way! Hopefully, from now on, I can look at those "inconvenient" dirty diapers as a reminder of the role He has for me and how He HAS equipped me for this role as a mother if I look to Him! Bring on the diapers!
I was just putting my youngest down for a nap with my 3 year old trailing behind me. I was at the top of the stairs with my youngest in my arms AND 9 months pregnant and I felt and heard an explosion erupt from the diaper area of the little, innocent thing. With a nap VERY needed by my son (and mom), I began to feel the urge to scream! I did use self-control! However, all the diapers and wipes were down the steep, tiring, never ending, stairway! Normally stairs would not be that big of a deal, but carrying the extra load of pregnancy, getting my 3 year old to get his blanket, a drink, get a kiss from big sister, get a hug from big brother, and go to the bathroom, it was quite a process! So an interruption of changing a diaper and retrieving all the supplies was a test of patience that I had not planned! So to save myself the physical exertion, I decided to ask my 3 year old if he would help me and get a diaper and wipes for his little brother. He turned around with I think the smell of burning rubber under his feet! He was so anxious to help his mom, (or maybe just to delay nap time :)! Quite a few minutes later, he brought the wipes up to me with a huge smile on his face and said, "Here mommy, I'm a beeeg helper!" He didn't think about the stairs and all the extra steps he would have to take. He just couldn't wait to be a servant and use all that he had to please me.
Later that day, (during the much needed nap time that we did finally make it to). I began to recall that incident and God laid something on my heart. The eagerness of my 3 year old to serve his mommy, is the exact way the way He desires us to be with Him as His children. There are times in our life when things are going pretty smooth and then something unexpected happens. A dirty diaper! We can make a choice to make excuses and think of ways to get out of something that God wants us to do OR we can look to God when He asks us to step out for Him. (Like my little 3 year old did for me. No questions asked, the smell of burnt rubber under his feet.) God wants me to obey with the anticipation of pleasing Him! My 3 year old did not consider how much quicker and easier if would have been for mommy to get the diaper. He did not look at all those stairs and how much work and effort it would take HIS little legs! he just went! God will ask things of us that we may think surely He could find somebody else who better fits the role or task He asks of us! I have said to God, "Surely there is a mother out there that could raise 11 children better than me God! Don't you see how weak I am?! This is hard God! Why do you trust me so much?!" He responds by letting me know that when we are out of our comfort zones and we are feeling weak, that is where He can show us His strength! We just need to be willing to say, "Okay God. It is tough and I don't always understand, but here I am!"
I told my 3 year old what a "beeeg" helper he was to mommy and how much I appreciated his help. You see, I could have done it my self! I did not NEED him to go downstairs fro me! I just asked him to help me. God does not NEED us to help Him. He could use a tree if He choose to! He just asks us to help Him and hopes that we obey and serve Him because that is what He desires from us! If we are eager to serve Him and with joy, do what He has called us to do, He will ask us to do more and more for Him! That will bring great contentment to our hearts and great pleasure to Him! That should be the greatest desire in our hearts is to please our heavenly Father! Just as my 3 year old pleased me, my Heavenly Father will be pleased with me when I chose His way! Hopefully, from now on, I can look at those "inconvenient" dirty diapers as a reminder of the role He has for me and how He HAS equipped me for this role as a mother if I look to Him! Bring on the diapers!
Friday, May 29, 2009
Foto Friday
Another picture from my daughter's photography list and I could not resist adding a picture of some sweet "flowers" in our home! (Although sometimes they don't smell as nice as the outdoor type!;)
Have a beautiful, God-filled weekend!
Have a beautiful, God-filled weekend!
Thursday, May 28, 2009
For Now~flashback
I found this in my achives and found it ironic that I am this far along as I type this!
It was a gentle reminder that this little one is in God's hands and I have no need to fear of the coming weeks.
We are His!
Soon this view will be all but a memory! But...
For now, I will look down and continue to watch the miracle of life growing inside of me!
For now, I will enjoy every move, bump and hiccup.
For now, I will savor knowing this baby is in the safest place it will ever be on this earth again.
For now, I will remind myself that never again will I be completely aware of every movement and detail of this little life in the same way I am now.
For now, I wait, dream and anticipate holding this little one in my arms.
For now, I wait on God to bring this little one into this world.
FOREVER... I put this little one's life in my creator's hands! The one who put this little life inside of me and the one who will decide when it is time for my life to be forever changed by my sweet baby's presence on the outside instead of the inside!
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Works For Me Wednesday
This is my Works for Me Wednesday entry.
Cleaners can be so expensive from laundry detergent to daily cleaners. I found some great cleaner at the Dollar Tree that costs, drum roll please, $1! There are 3 or 4 different types. Bathroom, kitchen, and multipurpose. I have removed many things off of my walls that would not come off with other cleaners even the infamous magic erasers! Ink, pencil, dried food (no, I do not as a rule leave food on my walls until it is dried, I just sometimes miss the baseboards and doorways!) I buy the multipurpose type because it can be used for anything. The scent is not overwhelming and it does a great job!
Another favorite of mine is Pine Sol. But I find it too concentrated so I dilute it 1/4 Pine Sol to 3/4 water in a spray bottle. It works great and still disinfects well. I use this from anything from our laminate floors, kitchen appliances, to our bathroom surfaces. (The same thing works with bleach! I use this diluted the same way for my bathrooms.)
I also make sure I only use 1/8-1/4 of recommended amount of laundry detergent. This is one way the companies of these products get our money! They, at the very least, tell us to use DOUBLE of what is really needed! I read in a magazine article years ago, that our clothes have so much extra detergent in them that every once in while I have discovered I can go one week without using detergent at all and my clothes still smell fresh and get clean. (I still use spot cleaner if needed on stains!)
My last tip for cleaning is using old bath towels. Instead of throwing them away or even using them in the garage, cut them into appropriate size and sew around the edges and you have great dish rags or dish towels that otherwise can be very costly!
Just some things that work for me!
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Needless Pain We Bear
Okay, It has been awhile. Really no excuse just had life and the business of it all creep in and decided something had to give for awhile so blogging was one of those things. There are also times I just can't imagine that anyone really cares what I have to say! :) Here I am, not any less busy in fact maybe more so, but taking the time to share my life again with those who read this.
Have you ever had a week where you cannot believe how many little things can happen and you lay down at night and wonder how or why it has not bothered you as much as it should or it has not even bothered you at all? This past week has been one of those times. I am now sitting back and thinking of all the things that have happened and I really feel "untainted" and untouched. So today, I have asked my self, why? The only answer I can give is the love and holding of my Heavenly Father.
What have these things been you might ask, okay maybe not, but here are some examples. I am 35 weeks pregnant and should be uncomfortable and miserable. I have even tried to force myself to find something to complain about, but have come up with nothing. Am I ready to have a baby, absolutely! Am I anxious to hold this little one? Absolutely! But have I been able to see the joy of helping God with this little miracle instead of finding the negative of the last month? Yes. If you know me, not a common way for me to be. I am not the most patient person in the universe especially when it comes to holding babies! Do my hips ache? Yes! Do I have to go to the bathroom every hour on the hour? YES! Do I have an appetite or do I feel like I want to throw up every time I think of food? I can't even fathom eating an entire meal with out puking! But, through all of that, I am thankful not unhappy. Maybe after the 11th child I am finally to the point of wisdom...although getting up 4 times a night to go the bathroom, at least I CAN go back to sleep! In a short time, sleep will come as a luxury, for awhile anyway! The next thing that happened to me this week was I took 2 of my girls to their music lesson in the same day and found out that NEITHER of them were having a lesson that day! One is in town and the other I drove 30 minutes away! I laughed! Not upset, not even one bit annoyed! I laughed! I know, I know, you are probably thinking why would that bother her? Well, I guess it is because I am very scheduled and using 2 hours away from home that could have been used for something more useful than sitting in a car when I hate driving in the first place, is one of those things that can rub me the wrong way at times! I actually loved having the 2 hours alone with my girls and we had a really good time! Now on to other things. Our car is in great need of new tires. Money, in great need also. We have 2 times in the coming week that my husband or I need to travel. Do I worry? Usually. But not this time. I have realized I am in God's hands and He knows our needs. I did not even look to my husband to "fix" the problem. I know he would if he could! So, I put no pressure on him to get it fixed! I am trusting in my heavenly Father! Through Him, it may be possible to go a thousand more miles when someone else tells us not to go another mile! On to the next dilemma. Last night my husband went to tuck the kids in and came upstairs to inform me that our washing machine is "toast"! Not a great thing in a household that has 4 loads of laundry a day! Missing one day could mean a pile of clothes that the kids could sled down! I said to him, "Well, we will look into it tomorrow." I did not even worry and I slept the whole night without even a care of it! (Well, except for the bathroom trips!) Now, remember, we cannot afford at this point to get new tires for our car, so a new washing machine is not even a thought! Do I wonder what we will do when we have to build a sky lift in a couple days to cross over the mountains of laundry? Yes, it has entered my mind. Do I know that this problem is bigger than me and now matter how much I fret, I have no answer? Yes.
The whole point to this little blog today is not to put myself on this great faith pedestal! Believe me, I lack faith so often and more times than not I try to figure things out BEFORE going to God. So I am dumb-founded at my calm heart and fullness of faith! All I know is for some reason, I have chosen to allow God to work in my situations this week instead of ME trying to write out a plan! I think I am to the point of realizing that without Him, I can do nothing anyway and even if I did, my plan would lack all things compared to the plans God has for me. So, here I sit with my hands in the air in total surrender to Him. Exactly where He wants me to be all the time. If only I would chose that path ALL the time! It reminds me of a hymn I know and love. "Oh what needless pain I bear! All because I do not carry everything to God in prayer!" Let Him carry your burdens today and thank Him for the answers He does have even if it is not in YOUR timing!
Have you ever had a week where you cannot believe how many little things can happen and you lay down at night and wonder how or why it has not bothered you as much as it should or it has not even bothered you at all? This past week has been one of those times. I am now sitting back and thinking of all the things that have happened and I really feel "untainted" and untouched. So today, I have asked my self, why? The only answer I can give is the love and holding of my Heavenly Father.
What have these things been you might ask, okay maybe not, but here are some examples. I am 35 weeks pregnant and should be uncomfortable and miserable. I have even tried to force myself to find something to complain about, but have come up with nothing. Am I ready to have a baby, absolutely! Am I anxious to hold this little one? Absolutely! But have I been able to see the joy of helping God with this little miracle instead of finding the negative of the last month? Yes. If you know me, not a common way for me to be. I am not the most patient person in the universe especially when it comes to holding babies! Do my hips ache? Yes! Do I have to go to the bathroom every hour on the hour? YES! Do I have an appetite or do I feel like I want to throw up every time I think of food? I can't even fathom eating an entire meal with out puking! But, through all of that, I am thankful not unhappy. Maybe after the 11th child I am finally to the point of wisdom...although getting up 4 times a night to go the bathroom, at least I CAN go back to sleep! In a short time, sleep will come as a luxury, for awhile anyway! The next thing that happened to me this week was I took 2 of my girls to their music lesson in the same day and found out that NEITHER of them were having a lesson that day! One is in town and the other I drove 30 minutes away! I laughed! Not upset, not even one bit annoyed! I laughed! I know, I know, you are probably thinking why would that bother her? Well, I guess it is because I am very scheduled and using 2 hours away from home that could have been used for something more useful than sitting in a car when I hate driving in the first place, is one of those things that can rub me the wrong way at times! I actually loved having the 2 hours alone with my girls and we had a really good time! Now on to other things. Our car is in great need of new tires. Money, in great need also. We have 2 times in the coming week that my husband or I need to travel. Do I worry? Usually. But not this time. I have realized I am in God's hands and He knows our needs. I did not even look to my husband to "fix" the problem. I know he would if he could! So, I put no pressure on him to get it fixed! I am trusting in my heavenly Father! Through Him, it may be possible to go a thousand more miles when someone else tells us not to go another mile! On to the next dilemma. Last night my husband went to tuck the kids in and came upstairs to inform me that our washing machine is "toast"! Not a great thing in a household that has 4 loads of laundry a day! Missing one day could mean a pile of clothes that the kids could sled down! I said to him, "Well, we will look into it tomorrow." I did not even worry and I slept the whole night without even a care of it! (Well, except for the bathroom trips!) Now, remember, we cannot afford at this point to get new tires for our car, so a new washing machine is not even a thought! Do I wonder what we will do when we have to build a sky lift in a couple days to cross over the mountains of laundry? Yes, it has entered my mind. Do I know that this problem is bigger than me and now matter how much I fret, I have no answer? Yes.
The whole point to this little blog today is not to put myself on this great faith pedestal! Believe me, I lack faith so often and more times than not I try to figure things out BEFORE going to God. So I am dumb-founded at my calm heart and fullness of faith! All I know is for some reason, I have chosen to allow God to work in my situations this week instead of ME trying to write out a plan! I think I am to the point of realizing that without Him, I can do nothing anyway and even if I did, my plan would lack all things compared to the plans God has for me. So, here I sit with my hands in the air in total surrender to Him. Exactly where He wants me to be all the time. If only I would chose that path ALL the time! It reminds me of a hymn I know and love. "Oh what needless pain I bear! All because I do not carry everything to God in prayer!" Let Him carry your burdens today and thank Him for the answers He does have even if it is not in YOUR timing!
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