What I'm thinking...

I have lots of thought in my head this week!  Nothing earth shattering, just things bouncing around in my head!  It is great to write them down and share:

• I'm ready for the weather to stay warm
• healthy kids are a blessing
• a Godly husband is too!
• I am 38 years old and still miss my mom!
• being a mom that practices what she preaches is really hard sometimes!
• 2 year olds are VERY opinionated
• 16 year olds are also!
• I love cloudy days
• I miss the child I never got to hold in my arms
• I am hoping for another child I will get to hold in my arms REALLY soon! (well, more than 9 months from now!)
• I treasure my 10 month old's "babiness" so much more
• siblings are VERY good at pointing out each others faults! :)
• adults are good at that too! :(
• flowers always cheer me up
• I wish supper was made already
• I really am thinking that having it made for the week would be great!
• Mother's Day should be celebrated by MOTHER'S not those being "mothered" because WE are the ones who are blessed!
• I am hoping to sell our house this summer
• I am worried that we might!
• Where would we live!  UGH!

Reflections of a Mother~

A letter to my children:

I gave you life, but cannot live it for you.

I can teach you things, but I cannot make you learn

I can give you directions, but I cannot be there to lead you

I can allow you freedom, but I cannot account for it

I can take you to church, but I cannot make you believe

I can teach you right from wrong, but I cannot always decide for you

I can buy you beautiful clothes, but I cannot make you beautiful inside

I can offer you advice, but I cannot accept it for you

I can give you love, but I cannot force it upon you

I can teach you to share, but I cannot make you unselfish

I can teach you respect, but I cannot force you to show honor

I can advise you about friends, but cannot choose them for you

I can advise you about sex, but I cannot keep you pure

I can tell you the facts of life, but I can't build your reputation

I can tell you about drink, but I can't say "no" for you

I can warn you about drugs, but I can't prevent you from using them

I can tell you about lofty goals, but I can't achieve them for you

I can teach you about kindness, but I can't force you to be gracious

 I can warn you about sins, but I cannot make you moral

I can pray for you, but i cannot make you walk with God

I can tell you how to live, but I cannot give you eternal life

I can love you with unconditional love ALL my life...

and I will!

God, on Mother's Day, I thank you for the privilege of being a mother!  There is nothing greater in life, than giving all that I have to the beautiful gifts you have given ME, my children!  May they see you in me and may you be pleased as you watch me raise them for you!  I thank you for allowing me to be a mother!

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Foto Friday~ Delish!!!

Just to curb your baby appetite,

Thought I would give you a picture to look at this weekend!

DELISH!!! :)

A moment in time

A moment in time...

My 4 and 5 year old got a t-shirt and a medal for saying 20 bible verses this year

They were so excited! 

I thought I better catch this moment because all too soon,

it will only be a memory!

The shirts will get to small,

and the medals will be used for who knows what! :)

But the verses they have learned will be hidden in their hearts forever!

And this picture, I will save and enjoy for many years! 

Time goes way to fast!

Too much for a woman's body?

Although nobody has dared to say it to may face after my recent miscarriage, I know it has been thought by many  or even talked about between others,   "Doesn't she know that her body has been through enough and this is a sign!  Why does she keep doing this to herself, it is catching up with her?!!  You can't have that many children and not have SOMETHING happen!" 

I am used to it by now and does it still bother me?  I can honestly say, no!  About 13 years ago, my husband and I were convicted to not use birth control.  Understand that it took time to get to the point where we totally surrendered that conviction!  (Proverbs 21:3~ to obey is better than sacrifice)  At the time, we knew to obey and if we did not, to us it would be a sin, so we did obey but it was not easy at  first!  The converstions between my husband and I would have questions like these:  "We could have 20 children!" or, "How can we afford more than we have?" or, "What will other people say?"  Now, those questions NEVER enter my mind!  I only have answers!  Could I have 20 children?  Yep!  And I would welcome that!  They are truly a blessing!  Although money is not flowing out of our bank account, and yes, we have times where we wonder how we are going to make it to payday!  But, God has ALWAYS provided!  We can't afford a huge beautiful home and 3 brand new cars and take a vacation every year, but we CAN afford more children!  How?  Depending on God and not our bank account!  Unless you have been there, I cannot describe how incredible it is watching God provide with an unexpected gift of money, clothing, bikes, furniture, and cars instead of us buying it for ourselves!  We don't depend on others and NEVER ask for handouts, they truly just come from God to us!  (WE do understand that He works THROUGH people and we are so grateful for those who has listened and obeyed Him!)  He has given us things that I could not have done working away from home and my husband being away from his family with some high paying job!  And as far as what other people say?  Well, I guess I have learned that you cannot please everyone all the time and no matter what you do, somebody will always criticize it!  AND if everyone is pleased with how you live and you fit in with everyone else, BEWARE!  You cannot please man AND God! 

Romans 8:8~ So then, those who are in the flesh cannot please God.

 In fact, we have found that when we are not recieving any negative feedback from those who are "in the world", we are usually walking a thin line between worldliness and Godliness and have had to check our spirits!  The bible says we are to be a "peculiar people" and these days, you don't get much more peculiar than allowing God to pick your family size!  (There are other things that God asks from people that can be just as peculiar, this just happens to be one of the faith walks God has choosen for us!)

As far as it being too hard on my body?  One thing I can say is, birth control has many more side affects that pregnancy EVER will! Here is a link to read,  I Think I'll Skip the Party .  Another thing, pregnancy  and childbirth actually lowers your rate for women's cancers: read here, and  here!  I can also let you know, it keeps you feeling young!  (So at the rate I am going, I should live to be about 200!)  God has given women's bodies the ability to carry many children if He chooses, and it is Him alone that supplies our needs physically and emotionally!  This last miscarriage was very hard emotionally, but not any tougher than anybody else going through one!  The doctor said, that my health is great and there is no greater risk for another pregnancy than there was before!  And yes, I am anxiously waiting for the day when God decides to bless us again, if He chooses!  (That also means being content if He chooses NOT to give us another child!)  That is actually scarier for me than having many more!  I love the blessing a child brings and I desire His plan for us!

 *Just a side note, when I hear the comment, "How do you do it with all those kids, I can't handle the 2 that I have!"  I could not do it without God!  (And sometimes I have had the thought, I could not do it with the two that you have either!  :)  )  The point I am making, is my husband and I are not doing this alone!  We are dependant on God for everything!  That is where he wants us to be anyway!  I have no choice but to get on my knees many times daily!  Praying for 11 children and their daddy, takes lots of burning the midnight oil!

I know when and if I announce another pregnacy, (and I hope that I have the chance to do that), there will be people who will have their negative opinions.  I am okay with that!  When you know that what you live is for the Lord, it does not matter what others think!  I want to go to bed every night, knowing that I am doing the best that I can living for God!  he never said it would be easy, but He does say He will be there to give me what I need!  He will never let me down and He will never let me go! 

I am not a person that likes to cause others to protest what I believe!  I live my life for Christ and that is who I follow!  If other's don't like my choices, it does not really matter, I am much more fearful of God than man!  "As for me and my house, WE will serve the Lord! "  Please don't waste your time with negative feedback!  I have already heard it all!  :)  If you need encouragement for something you are doing for Christ, that goes against what others think is "good" for you, I can relate!  Feel free to contact me!  I would love to encourage you!  Remember, it will all be worth it someday! 

Weekend Reading

A blog that I follow daily, just posted a post that is exactly what our family believes also!  So many of us homeschooling moms try to do way more than what God expects of us!  As she says, "God did not create classrooms, he created families!"  Love that!  If you are trying to do it all, take a look at this and maybe you will get some relief! 

http://www.generationcedar.com/main/2010/03/relaxed-homeschooling-creating-a-lifestyle-of-learning.html

Have a great weekend being with your family AND enjoy "teaching" them as you live!

Easy Rice and Sausage Casserole

This recipe takes literally about 10 minutes to make if the sausage is precooked:

Sausage and Rice Casserole

1 1/2 lbs of crumbled sausage
2 bags of cooked Uncle Ben's Multigrain rice (takes 90 seconds in microwave)~ You can use the box kind but it takes longer because you must cook it before you add it to ingredients

1 can of cream of chicken soup

1 can of beef broth

1/2 cup of chopped celery and onions (optional)

2 cups shredded cheddar cheese

*Mix all together in a bowl and put in 9x13 pan and bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes
(I always double the recipe for company)

It's that easy!

Enjoy!

The miracle~

I would like to say it is not the news I had been hoping for.  My journey with this baby inside of me is over, but after reading this poem, how could I ask for more for this little one!  In my eyes, no matter what the outcome turned out to be, it will always be considered a miracle in my eyes!  And someday, I will have the honor of holding this sweet baby in my arms and not just my heart!  So for now, I will say goodbye, but not forever, just for a time!


"A BABY'S SECRET"


I'm just a little person who didn't make it there;
I went straight to be with Jesus,
but I'm waiting for you here.


Don't you fret about me, Mommy,
I'm of all God's lambs most blessed;
I'd have loved to stay there with you,


but the Shepherd knows what's best.
Many dwelling here where I live,
waited years to ent...er in;
Struggled through a world of sorrow,
and their lives were marred with sin.


So, sweet Mommy, don't you sorrow ~
Wipe those tears and chase the gloom ~
I went straight to Jesus' bosom
from my mother's womb.


Thank you for the life you gave me ~
It was brief, but don't complain...
I have all of heaven's glory...
suffered none of earthling's pain.


- by Sandi Johnson

Thank you for being there for me and all of the prayers!  I cannot tell you how much it has meant!  I am letting go of the pain day by day and know that God's plan is best!  I will walk with no fear inside knowing my Heavenly Father holds me in His hand!